Prayer is difficult

Prayer has always been a complicated subject for me. It's difficult to think we can talk to God and that he hears us. It's a problem because we are so sinful and he isn't. So how does that make sense? Does God actually hear you if we are so full of sin?

But it's true, he does actually listen. But why don't we always get the answers we want?  It's probably because we are so sinful. Is God just a jerk because he doesn't answer us the way we want? What if he actually gave us what we wanted all the time? Wouldn't he just be giving us into our own vices? I don't think God answers our prayers the way we want all the time because he has to love us, because he wants to love us.

What about all the other evils then, shouldn't they be taken care of? Yes we can pray for every evil in the world and God hears our prayers but why does he let them happen? Is it because they must happen? Is God teaching us to rely on him. I think prayer is definite result and sign of us relying on God and trusting in him. Coming to God with our decisions, wants, and needs shows God how much we love him and trust him.

I have never been one of those "prayer warriors" or one who would volunteer to pray a lot in group settings. Corporate prayer has always been a tough thing for me. Even when I am not the one praying, sometimes my thoughts wander, sometimes it's a real problem. But lately I have been praying more in groups and for longer times. This past week I went with a college group to pray in front of the abortion clinic. I had never really done something like that before. It was public and it was against something that's overwhelming to think about. At first it was kind of scary but I prayed about it and God eased my anxiety. Yet we were still honked at and yelled at on the street. But I don't think that was the hardest part of it.

We had to talk to God for an hour. Each one of us got a turn but still an hour? I could list off all the prayer concerns in way less than that very easily. But it was about the hour and not exactly how we prayed. Coming up with something new to pray about was difficult however praying about the same thing over and over again was really important. It also didn't turn into a competition for who is the most creative in prayer. No it was about praying to God and crying out to him for what is the most important thing. Saying it again and again, begging God to hear our prayers and answer them. I think God desires discipline in these subjects, especially prayer and fasting. Paul says he prays continually for the saints and that we should also. Many times in the Old Testament prophets have done crazy difficult things while trying to pray to God. I think this is a definite need and we forget about that need.

Thanks,
Dave